In the fast-paced and high pressured world of business, leaders often find themselves caught between the demands of the office and the devotion to their homes. Striking a healthy balance is crucial for personal and professional happiness. Health and happiness at home will pour over to your leadership in the office. Unfortunately, the contrary is also true. Here are 3 quick principles on striving toward a healthy marriage.

_{I. Keep Your Manners}

The beauty of marriage is in the fact that it is a multifaceted relationship all wrapped into one. The Bible calls it becoming one flesh. Even if you are not a spiritual person, the truth remains. Your spouse simultaneously can be your lover, friend, closest neighbor, baby mother, baby father, business partner and therapist. Here is the principle. If you are working through a disagreement from one of those compartments, do not neglect the others. Even though you may be upset as lovers, say good morning to your friend. Even though you may be upset as business partners, say goodnight as lovers. Keeping your manners is a great way to deescalate an argument.

II. Proper Responses Lead to Wins

Dr. Charles Shoemaker in his great book “Ten Pillars of an Awesome Marriage: Don’t endure what you can enjoy!” talks about the four options every spouse has after an intense argument. Cheat code: D is the right answer.

A. Clam Up: Just keep it all inside in a false attempt to keep the peace.

B. Blow Up: Just let it all out with the intensity of all your emotions without properly calculating your words.

C. Give Up: Put in no effort, restraint or energy towards finding resolution. Just walk away from everything.

D. Grow up: Do the hard introspective work of processing the problem and beginning with how you can mature and change for the better.

III. Channel Your Energy Correctly

Beth Moore described marriage beautifully when she said, “Marriage is your most sacred relationship on this earth, and prayer is the single most powerful means of protecting that relationship.” When you are faced with an intense moment in marriage be sure to let out your built up energy in the right manner. If you are a person of faith, then there is no better way than through prayer. If you are not, go for walk and call a friend or talk to yourself. (Your neighbors already know you are crazy anyways). Another great option is to write it down in a journal and process through it as you read and write.